how many horses does it take to piss on a cat 17 beccause rape isnt real in somalia

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your face is hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Everybody love food when they are hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops