There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

Why was the women not in the kitchen? She was dead

It sucks if you have amnesia. It sucks if you have amnesia.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

kk

The joke below was so funny I forgot to laugh.

A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

Q: What's worst than the Holocaust? A: 6 million Jews

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

man1:did you know hellen keller had a dog? man2: no man1: neither did she

There is an elephant, a zebra, a lion, and a black man. The black man is enjoying his visit to the zoo.

what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

cool

Yo mama so poor, she can't afford luxuries

I walked into temptation yesterday, He said hi.

Knock knock... Whose there? Patrick Oh hey, come in...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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