Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

Alright then, call me sometime then.

Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

Three french men are in the car wearing sombreros. They're trying to get to Disney World.

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

Your Mother

What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...