A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

thumb_up thumb_down -21

In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

a man walks into a house. he gets shot in the leg and is brought to jail because he was a burglar and was trying to steal the family's tv.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's even worse than getting a parking ticket on your birthday? Child molestation.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A woman was talking to Ghandi. "Oh wait" He says "I can't, My kids are home"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats worse then getting shot in the leg? Getting shot twice in the leg

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a trash can? -Finding a dead baby in 5 trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops