What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

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Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

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Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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(This poem is written by a dog) Roses are gray Violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

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What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

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What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

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A black man walks into a bar and treated with equal care

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XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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I have suicidal thoughts

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

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How do five Jews get to America? They get their passports and ride a public plane, safely leaving the airport and getting on a taxi to go to their hotel.

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Why didn't the boy drop his ice cream He was hit by a bus and he wasn't eating ice cream

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A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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