I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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Hey, did u know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans By: Trey & Trenton of Texas

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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Do you want to hear a shit joke? Stuart.

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three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

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A black man burned down my house. It was on minecraft you racist!

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

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Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

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what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

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What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

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In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

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So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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