What do you call cheese that isn't your's Well it would depend on what type of cheese it actually is

why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

What do you call a needy person? A person whos needs need needs.

Q: Why do some women insist they don't have penises or testicles? All humans have penises and testicles! A: These women have been brainwashed by feminism. It's quite sad, really.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was an avocado

"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

knock knock whos their a person

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

An Italian man with a very thick accent decides to travel to America. On arriving, he decides to take a taxi and tour the nearby city. The man, feeling hungry after a while, chooses to stop at a bakery. Upon entering the bakery, the man walks up to the display of bread, and points at the loaves of bread he wanted, calling to the baker "I want 2 piece." The baker, not understanding the man's accent asks the man to repeat what he said. So the man repeats, "I want 2 piece, right here, right now." "Sure thing," the baker says, and gives the man the loaves of bread.

the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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