whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +37

who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

thumb_up thumb_down +35

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +33

if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A terrorist. What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. What are you racist or something?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops