How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

Give me time to think of a joke hm..............hm.................hm....................hm....................mmm....................hm?..........................m m.....................mmmmm..............hm...................hm.....................hm......................... ah!i don't want to think of a joke

Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

How do you make a little boy cry? You rape his dog

Roses are red Violets are blue I kill children dont worry about it

When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

Why did the guy hate the man that said,"I respect you?'' Because the man was Hitler.

How do you make your friends more positive ? Infect them with HIV.

What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? The World Trade Center wasn't ruined by clumsiness.

Why did the creeper not go home? Because his parents blew up. (As told by a 7 year old.)

How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None they just beat up the room for being black

What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

Whats the difference between babies and a dart board? Dart boards dont bleed

A boy walks into a shop He buys some sweets.

robin, get in the car.

What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...