So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase as a chicken its intulect this very low so walking in the middle of the street was it's 1st instest. Ther'for it crossed the road and made it to the other side safe. Now please don't ask me a stupid question like that again.

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Q. How do you blindfold a Chinese man? A. With a blindfold.

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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What goes 100 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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Q: Whats the longest book in the library A: Understanding Women

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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An Irish man walks past a bar... it could happen...

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

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What's the best thing about shrimp? It never goes bad.

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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What did the teacher do? He taught.

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What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

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Where are you going Your house

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On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me nothing because I'm single

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops