Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

thumb_up thumb_down

josh roberts goes to church to take advantage of religiously confused young boys

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

thumb_up thumb_down

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

thumb_up thumb_down

Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

thumb_up thumb_down

What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

thumb_up thumb_down

A Chinese man fails a math test

thumb_up thumb_down

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I know a kid named Ruslonia. What type of name is that?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If you had to go blind, would you go blind? If you said no, then you are wrong. You had to go blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Wait what? I did not type that!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walked into a bar and said "Ouch".

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops