Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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Your mother is so average in weight and in attractiveness.

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A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

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Why did the guy eat his mom? people get hungry in this world

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An Asian Man Has His Eyes Wide Open

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Women's rights.

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Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Yo momma's so fat she ate Sally's arms. Knock Knock Who's There. The police we have a warrant for your mothers arrest on charges of cannibalism and kidnapping.

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What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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Q: Why did the guy ring the doorbell? A: Because he was sick of all the crappy knock-knock jokes

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Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's Roses are Red

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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In the middle of a long flight from Heathrow to Chicago O'Hare, the passengers of a 747 watched the engines all suddenly flame out. "Now, folks," the captain said over the PA as the plane plummeted to the earth, "I want it on record that I said it in plain English: a 747 can't fly from Heathrow to Chicago without refueling." No one bothered writing it down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops