What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

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You: What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? Person: A towel?! You: No, an aquaphilian woman drying off a car ;)

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see.

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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i love to lick...

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Why did the chines were sunglasses? It was sunny.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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so david walks into a convenience store and wanted to buy a pack of gum. so he asks the cashier how much is the gum and the cashier said that it is 99 cents and then david said oh no! i thought it was 98 cents.

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

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How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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A man walks into a bar but didn't say anything because he is mute.

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Why did the burrito taste bad? It's a giraffe.

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Women's Rights

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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