What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

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Latvian guy said to the other latvian guy: ''Why did the chicken cross the road?'' The other latvian guy responded: ''In truth, i do not know. I have not seen chicken in 10 years. The last time was before the red army plundered my village. I can still hear all the screams from the women being raped. But, back to question. Where is this chicken you speak of? I have not eaten in days and my wife and children are close to starvation aswell''

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How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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Knock Knock. Who's There? The Landlord. Your rent's late.

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what do you call aca that got pushed in a pool ? A WET PUSSY

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

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charlie sheen

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

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What do you call a girl who disappears on the 3 May 2007? Madeleine McCann

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What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuase 7 watched his friend die. He slowly went into a depression so deep he went on a murderous rampage.

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A man and his dog walk into the park, the man grabs a ball and chucks it for the dog. The dog can not chase after the ball because he has no legs and bites his owners leg.

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How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He had nobody to go with :)

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A man with no face walks into a bar, another man sees this and promptly asks "Sir, why do you have no face?" The first man says nothing and walks away.

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A squirrel runs into a bar and out-runs the bartender to get some assorted nuts on the table then runs out of the bar

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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What do you get when you cross an orange with a gerbil? A mailbox that lights up when you open it

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Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops