What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

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Why did moral man run out of morals? Moral: LEAVE MORAL MAN ALONE! BUAHAHAHA LEAVE HIM ALONE! BUAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Why did my mom smell bad. Because she is a corpse and has been dead for some days now

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Owl." "Interrupting Owl who?"

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh no! Someone's been murdered in my garden!

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Why can a bird fly Because it's not a banana

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Knock Knock Who's there? Reality, we have come to install a doorbell.

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Why was the dog crying? Do dogs even cry?

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Vagina.

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How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense Microwave

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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Church.

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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What's worse than having two girlfriends at once? Seven. Seven girlfriends.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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i like it in the mouth

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

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Granny porn!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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