"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

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-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

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Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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?J?o?k?e?

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? No reply cause Kyle got knocked out by the door.

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How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

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Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue...........Im wearing socks

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Ill do a lot more than just try you, anyways, technically I learned to play the piano as a kid, but now I play on a small cheap keyboard (the musical kind) and sincerely, I kinda suck at it now, my abusive parents expected perfection beat the shit out of me blahblahblah, thats really all of it, trauma. My senses, well, when I was a kid I was terrified of gravity (one of the rarest fears in the world) because I had no idea I was consciously shifting things myself. So lets say... If I somehow end up hanging upside down, I just shift it, so my brain believes I am not and I experience no discomfort, there is a lot more to it, ill tell you, damn nose wont stop bleeding and my waifu got a bit scared, she got some bad bronchitis and she still has not recovered a 100 percent, but its just the cough now though... Lets just say that my ability to balance, is about 300-500 percent higher than any regular human, and that I can stand on one leg enough to beat the guiness record book 50 times... ...IIIIF I was in good shape, which I am not.

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I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black and so is my neighbor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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