Q: What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? A: A set of Legos

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

What's faster a hungry black guy or a car? A car

What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

What did the black jewish homosexual say to the conquistador? Nothing as they were both from entirely different time periods.

Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

KONY 2012

What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

what happend to Helen Keller when she fell in a hole She climed out of the hole

What do you call a man with a gun? An accident waiting to happen.

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

A black man walks Into a bar.

There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

Well... At that time everyone expected that the only people that knew hypnosis where either "born with the gift from the stars" or was some old beard man that spent "hundreds of years in the mountains".or a wizard or a shamanic priest, or well some guy in a particular stupid suit of sorts, it increased its potency simple as that, as having people stare at me and laugh because "You are not some beardy guru master" is a pretty bad start for the effective use of mass hypnosis. Mono-ideoism actually just means really concentrated focus on a single object or state of mind, the thing about the name (aside from sounding kinda mono-idiotic) is that strong focus alone does NOT lead to a state of relaxation which is one of the prime requirements to achieve a state of trance, I mean try focusing on something really hard and your body produces a huge amount of beta waves, aka stress. All of that is bullshit, but my horrible childhood did leave me with the "gift" to space out pretty quickly, so I learned it pretty fast without really knowing what it was at first.

There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

What is the difference between a priest and a nun? Cant you see the nun is dead you insensitive bastard!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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