They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

How do you make a little boy get off a swing? You are an adult and perhaps it is inappropriate for you to be on a swing, especially when it is already occupied by a child of the right age.

What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

A kid wanted to change the channel... One thing leads to another.

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

Hail Heetluh

Why do black guys have big dicks? God felt bad putting pubes on their head

What's funnier than a Laffy Taffy joke? Almost anything.

what is black and is a really bad neighbor. your bad neighbor wearing a black shirt.

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gays house! knock knock who's there? The chicken!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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