What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

???????????? ???????????? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? A wild EXEGGUTOR appeared!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

One dog says to the other dog "Nice day, isn't it?" The other dog says "You can talk!?"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red violets are blue I have altimers cheese on toast Srry bout the spelling. I couldn't REMEMBER!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why does beyonce sing "to the left to the left?" cause women have no rights

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your mother is so nice, I saw her while grocery shopping and we pleasantly chatted. She also remembered my name and invited me to come over sometime and have a snack.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I was walking down the street then my hands were itchy so I stuck em in my pockets Jk, I'm a donkey. We don't have hands

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops