What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

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Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

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Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

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A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

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404: Anti-joke not found.

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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police are looking for max 'cheesehead' harrison

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Roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

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If you send someone fudge, you should write them a poem with it Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge!

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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How does a black man put puzzles together? First, he locates the four corners. Next, he begins filling in the sides. Finally, he uses the picture on the box to fill in the center. It can be a very tedious process if he is not paying attention.

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Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

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Why was Cathy sad. Her husband Drew was killed by a land mine on a peace keeping mission to Iraq.

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Q: What happened when Paul couldn't decide on Pornhub or Redtube. A: nothing since he doesn't have a d***

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Q: why do english soldiers have red coats? A: to cover the blood stains, so they can still lead their platoons when they are shot. why else?

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Ain't idn't a word.

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2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

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A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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