Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *goes crazy and shoots himself*

Knock knock

why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

A train poops its pants.

Black guys shoot. White guys have small penises. Black guys steal. White guys have keep money. Black guys are broke. That's what she said.

What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

a man walks into a bar and it hurts

What did the woman say when she lost her purse? Where's my purse?

Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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