Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

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What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

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Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

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shut up kobe!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

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I'm a champion. I do what I want.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff, Whats not pink and fluffy? Sexual assault.

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Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

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Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

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How old is your mom Dead

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I like it, I like it becuase it is cream

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"why did the cheese not go to church on sunday" "because it was jewish"

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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drugs.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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A mute man writes a joke that would only be funny to blind people.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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