What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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Wait what? I did not type that!

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Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

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A man walked into a bar and said "Ouch".

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Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

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If you had to go blind, would you go blind? If you said no, then you are wrong. You had to go blind.

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Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

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I know a kid named Ruslonia. What type of name is that?

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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