What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

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What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

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Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

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Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

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a blind man walks off a cliff..... he's dead now.

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

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yo mama so ugly she made a happy meal frown.

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A dog walks into a bar and the bartender gives him a bowl of water because it is hot outside and he doesn't want the dog to dehydrate because he could die.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

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I bit a horses leg. Why? Because I thought i was a vampire. I also bit my sisters glodfish in half.. Why? Cause I wanted revenge on my sister.

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What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

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Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

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What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

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How do you get a blind man out of a tree? Yes.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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