what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do abortion and a coat hanger have in common? they both contain 4 vowels

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call an Asian man in a car? A motorist.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +13

if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops