Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

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Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

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What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

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What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

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Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

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Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

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What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

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Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

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Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

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So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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