What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

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What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

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What do you call a Black Priest? His title would probably be Reverend, and then his last name after it.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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A mushroom walks into a bard and the bartender admonishes him and tells him to leave. The mushroom says "Aw, c'mon...you stupid jerk!"

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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What's worse than having two girlfriends at once? Seven. Seven girlfriends.

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What do you call an Amerindian who finished medical school? A doctor.

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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a lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for directions. the Bartender takes him into a room and rapes-him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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Why did the old man drop his milk? He had a stroke.

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a man walked into a bar....

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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What do you call two mexican's jumping the border? people with a hard life trying to get to the new world.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops