I can be considerate if like someone is burning to death and I was the one considerate enough to lit them on fire... Wait no, I am considerate towards my friends (which are all ladies, all men besides me are obstacles and nothing else) AAAAND my logic processor broke down. Anyway, please do me the honors, take the last message.

yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

Father Murphy met Samuel Myer on the street. Sam it's been a month o' Sundays since I've seen you. You look propserous. How's the moile business? A snip better, Father, since we talked last. And thank you. For what, Sam? Well the last time we met you asked what I did with the foreskins. Well, here is the answer, my new business. What's this, a wallet. But so smooth, Sam. Yeah, Father, but when you rub it. Rub it, Sam? Yeah when you rub it it falls apart. And you have to buy a new one! Mazel Tov!

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

Knock knock, COME IN!

Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

Nero, sure you are okay?

What's funnier than Justin Bieber dying in a car accident? Nicky Minaj being in the same car.

elen degeneres is straight....

What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

Roses are red, violets are black, you better watch your anus, cause jimmy is back!!

Brain fart

Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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