What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

noah is a scrub jungle

thumb_up thumb_down +9

OIO

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many women does it take to arrange my new Ethan Allen furniture? Just one, I was told it was divorce present. She took it with her.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the fat boy cry? His grandmother died

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Justin Beiber's Talent.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Who's there? You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy. You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy, who?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Aww Eliza, thanks for being around in spirit, dont leave yet, I am kinda having breathing problems, and Alice says my something levels are dropping because I need solid food, please dont leave, I cant tell time even with a watch, but would you mind waiting a bit? Ill eat fast, somehow.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walked into a bar. He got a head trauma and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops