Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

Knock knock Who's there Boo Boo who DONT BE SUCH A PUS*Y

Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

Do you know what's funny? 9/11

Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? He's blind. Also he is dead.

Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

Nuclear Bombs are bad. But erections are good.......as long as they are stroked

How are you doing today? I'm fine...Except for the rape.

whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

Your mother is so morbidly obese that if she sat on me, she would crush my skull and kill me.

A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

Why did the baby's bedroom smell so bad? The mom farted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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