What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

That's what she didn't say

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

If life throws you melons, either catch them or get out of he way to avoid injury.

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, nor does the chicken because it's a chicken.

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

TWIX PAUSE!

Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

whats worse then getting fired from your job? Getting raped by a giant gorilla with a 4 foot long penis following by being bitten by a very poisonous rattle snake and slowly dying a painful death.

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

Winter

How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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