A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

meatspin.fr

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

thumb_up thumb_down +29

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So a man walks into a bar, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Bryson got a concussion...he died

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, you're entire family is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

thumb_up thumb_down +27

There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Starting a Genocide #YOLO

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is a black person's favorite food? It varies from person to person, just as with any race.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops