Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What is small and gives people courage? Certain kinds of illegal drugs

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Old guitars sound like cat's guts

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he got shot. Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down +41

If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What does Santa Claus keep in his gardening shed? Nothing. Santa Claus isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +35

im at school

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops