Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

Tic tac toe. I never met my father

How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

Why did the Police Officer pull over the black man? The black man was not following the rules of the road and accepted the ticket with great remorse. The Officer then proceed to pull over a white man for this very same offence.

Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

What did the black man watch basketball instead of Tennis? Because Basketball is a very popular sport to African Americans, and tests show they can just higher than Caucasians, Asians and Hispanics.

What's Brown and dirty? Dirt

When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

A plane is falling out of the sky, and there is a Priest, a little boy, Obama and a rock star. There are 4 parachutes and everyone jumps out safety.

Where is the last place you would find a Mexican? In a good hiding spot that you didn't think of while trying to find him.

Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

yo mamas so fat she weighs a lot.

A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby" "One's fun to hit with a bat and the other One's a watermelon.

Papa Smurf: Why did the chicken cross the road? Grouchy Smurf: I hate chickens!

Q: What happened when the Mexican went to the doctors? A: He was diagnosed with depression.

why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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