What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

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What's worse than breaking your arm? Blonde Girls

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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One day, a woman was walking down an alleyway at midnight She reached the end of the alley and realised that it was a dead end, as there was a brick wall, so she turned around and headed on back home.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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so a huge calculator walks into a bar, and a man steps out from behind it, and wipes his forehead.

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So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You write a really difficult riddle in braille and tell her to solve it.

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What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

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Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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What did the indian man say to the black man? "Hi."

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!". The grasshopper turns and says "You've got a drink named Steve?"

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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People say the sky's the limit................................ but there's footprints on the moon.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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