Women's Professional _________

What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

A cat ran into the road...I hit it

Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except that didn't work for the boy. He also lost his ice cream.

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

I need a side cart on my motorcycle just for my diick

A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

Why was the man in the kitchen? Because his wife was raped and killed.

There was a big guy he was called Mac. So Mc Donalds turned him into a burger

Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

Psychics.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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