What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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Why is Timmy a dumbass ? He's not, because asses cannot, by definition, be intelligent, so it is unnecessary to qualify it as "dumb".

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How did the Jew escape the concentration camp? He didn't he was caught and put in the gas chamber.

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Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

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Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

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YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

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Two blondes and a brunnett walk into a bar. Remarkably, there was nothing else notable about any of them.

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Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

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Penis.

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So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

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That awkward moment when sentences don't end the way you octopus.

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A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

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baloney sandwich

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Whats the next Line? YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH....

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Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, nobody could fit inside a pineapple, nor could a pineapple survive in the sea

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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hi jonny

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A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

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An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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