Whats has no comedic value? A brick

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What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

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What did the clam say to the scuba diver? FUCK MAN! STOP TOUCHING MY JEWELS! WOULD YOU WANT ME TO JUST RIP YOURS AND TAKE THEM WITH ME!

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Why can't Tommy ride his bicycle? Because Tommys' bike has a missing pedal.

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Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

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How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

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why didnt the girl laugh at the joke? because it wasnt funny

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What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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What has four legs, yet it can't walk? A dead horse.

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What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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why did the chicken cross the street i dont know thats why im asking you

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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A woman went outside for some fresh air.

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JAMIE STEGMAN IS A MASSSIVE DERP Jess Pots. YOUR A NOOB

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Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

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why did the plumber start to cry? his family died

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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