fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

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Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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Jake was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. His wife looks down and sees a scale.

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Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

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CAS

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Ding dong Who's there Electricity

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What's better then a bad anti joke? A Good anti joke.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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What do you call the child of a black male and an asian female? A child of mixed ethnicities.

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PEANIS!

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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What do you call a new born baby ? Whatever name you and your partner have agreed upon after months of sifting through baby names.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing, they had just met and both were very shy.

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When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

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knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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