A black guy and a white guy are in a fight, who wins The white guy because they were in a fight over when the black guy was going to die.

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

What's brown and sticky? Poo.

Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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