Why did Lebron go to Miami? Because Chuck Norris told him to.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the black man say to the asian man? hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Yo mamma so black that u can't see her eyebrows

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man was running from drug dealers When they had him cornered he ran towards the sun and died

thumb_up thumb_down -16

knock knock who's there auntie auntie who? anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme oo

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A bald guy walks out of a bar Prostate cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops