If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

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What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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What do you call a black guy riding a unicycle? A black guy riding a unicycle.

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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What is the difference between me and you? I am not readin this joke.

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A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

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What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

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What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

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How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

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A:knock, knock B:who's there A:come in B:come in who A:me I'm gay

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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How do you get 100 Jews in a car? It is physically impossible to fit 100 full grown homosapians into a vehicle, therefore it will not work.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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