How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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Arron Glass

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

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Why did Cody sit in the corner? Because his daddy didn't love him. #DaddyDoesn'tLoveYouAnymoreChair

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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hi, im sober.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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im gay because im gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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