how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

whitney housten was supposed to sing at my funeral... but i dont think thats gonna happen. ;(

What you reading? reading?

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

You're so stupid, you had to take part in special classes in school, and despite this specific attention to your educational development, you've made no major progress.

An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

im a dragon, no im not

What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

One day little billy was wandering happily through the forest.He then trips and his legs disintegrate

What is the difference between a dead baby and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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