roses are blue violets are red i messed up so f... this s..t

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what's white and sticky semen

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

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Q: Do these jeans make me look fat? A: No your fat makes you look fat.

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A serial killer walks into a bar... He is finally arrested after killing several people within the bar, goes to court, and it was decided that he is suffering from a rare case of maddening schizophrenia, and sent indefinitely to a mental hospital...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monekey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the girl fall of of her bike? She was hit by three monkeys and a refridgerator

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How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

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why does little Lucy have no friends? because she is in a wheelchair

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What's big, moves around everywhere, and has four wheels? four TEENS on four wheelers

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If you were a booger..................... I would get a tissue so i could blow my nose.

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So three black men walk into a bank, one of them uses the ATM, they all proceed to the exit after he is done.

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Which came first, the chicken , the egg, the chick, the dinosaur, or the fried chicken nuggets?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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