why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

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What happens when you bite the head off of two animal crackers and make them play leap frog? Nothing. Quit playing with your food.

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How do you hook up with a really hot chick? This website is intended for Anti-Jokes, Not Dating Advice.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

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Lil Wayne

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What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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What did the bacon say to Sam's eggs? Why are you green?

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roses are blue violets are red i messed up so f... this s..t

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Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

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Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

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Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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what's white and sticky semen

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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