Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

Have you ever seen that really famous blind man's house? Neither has he.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

wael.. nuff said

ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

I went up to my friend and she said to me, "Foop." I calmly went to the nearest teacher and told her that Susie is having a mental breakdown again

roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

What happened to the bus? An unexpected, unforseen, instantaneous, sudden finger began to slowly disintergrate the earth

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

What happened when the old woman crossed the road? A completely unrelated archery accident lead to the deaths of several people and thousands of dollars of property damage in another part of the country. The woman crossed without injury.

In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

j

your mothers so fat...... shes borderline diabetic.

Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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