mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

Roses are RED , Violets are BLUE , once Valentines day is Over , All ya girls is gonna go back to LOVIN' THE CREW.

Q: What do you do when you see a half dead black guy on your front lawn? A: Call the ambulance because he is dying

What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? Nickleback.

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You write a really difficult riddle in braille and tell her to solve it.

A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

Knock knock... Home invasion

What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

What's worse than eating a rotton fruit that makes you sick?? Getting raped by a giant jackalope and then being left for dead in the middle of nowhere and being found by an old pedophile whose van ran out of gas and then running away only to find some water but while you were drinking it you got grabbed and dragged under the water by an octopus who has wandered off many miles from its home and then dying because humans don't have gills

yo' momma's so fat that when she saw a doctor he told her that she was overweight.

why did the kid get a bad grade he didnt study

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

Why is the fat man fat? Because he has an extremly bad metabolism which makes him gain two pounds from eating one cheeseburger

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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