roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

why dont they make black forks

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

why did the plumber start to cry? his family died

what's the difference between a crocodile?

Q: How do you make babies cry? A: Throw a brick at it's face.

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

knock knock whose there? my penis.

An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

my grandpa has the heart of a lion, and a permanent ban to the zoo.

What did the fat man do? He fell over...

Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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