Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25

How do you know a blonde's been in your refrigerator?? There's lipstick on the cucumber!

Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

Some woman's like "Make me a sandwich!" Some guy's like "No way!" The woman says "Or I'll rape you!" "Allright. Fine with m... Wait... I thought women didn... I mean couldn.. you know.." "Rape?" "No, eat sandwiches!"

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

If i was a painting... Id hang myself

Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

Can everyone please stop posting shit about my girlfriend because it seriously isnt cool.

Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

Q: What's black, long, and floppy? A: Black Licorice

Q. Name six animals that live in the north pole A.Four polar-bears and two penguins

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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